Sunday, May 10, 2009

A Second Chance??



Just now I was chatting with a friend.. And he asked me "Are you still with him??"
Pat came the reply frome me "Kind of"
Discussion about him ended there but then I started thinking - What the F***k..What am I doing??

I should have said No.Not at all..I cant be with a person who treated me as a crap.

Around two weeks back I called him and he replied "Move On"..And I was trying to move on..

And suddenly three days back he calls me and says SORRY and I'm all for him again..I again start waiting for his calls..I dont leave my phone anywhere.I'm again forwarding those mushy lovey-dovey messages to him..I'm planning my future again with him..

Am I again building a glass castle only to be broken..or should I trust him one more time just to be let down again , just to be thrashed again, to be left again all by myself ..

Am I losing my self-respect??I need to find out these answers before I succumb to him again..
I dont want to lose myself again just to feed his ego..

40 comments:

suren said...

A little bit of self restrain can go a long way
in undestanding relationships!

preposterous girl said...

@Suren
yeah ..Need to figure out I need to restrain or let go myself!

Dazed by the Light I See... said...

I have been through the same type of relationship... It is hard but as Suren said, a little self restrain is good... You dote on him, he takes you for granted, WHICH SHOULD NOT BE ACCEPTABLE by YOU... And to let you to a secret which worked for me, ignoring definitely helps... Ignore him a little and see the wonders...

Adesh Sidhu said...

Hmmm...This is confused you. Well my suggestion look for other important things in your life and put this issue on back burner for sometime. I know it is easier said than done but you need to move on...

rads said...

Well if he says "Move on" then I guess you should and tell him "tada byebye, hope I never see your face again".

suren said...

There are so many intelligent people around..loving all their comments..all mature to understand this..try to love life for sometime in meanwhile n gets ur mind away of him..haan agar zyaada ho toh say him fuck off..it works actually bigtime:)

- Sugar Cube - said...

Never chase the guy..he takes you for granted .Give him a cold shoulder ...he'll run back to you ;)
And if not..then he doesn't deserve you :))

Be at a distance even when he's said sorry.That way you give him a chance & also play safe.

- Sugar Cube - said...

Oh btw , I was going to change my template to the one you are using..but b4 I cld , you already had it :(
lol

Archana said...

Every time you make an excuse for giving him another chance, you're chipping away at your self respect. :/ You don't owe him that! Actions speak louder than words, and if he has repeatedly treated you wrong, then you need to shrug him off like a bad habit.

Don't get your heart broken over and over, because no matter how many times you piece it back together it's never the same as it was before.

Keep your chin up and say bye-bye to the ex.

preposterous girl said...

@Dazed by light I see
thanx 4 the secret..Yeah I'm trying that..lets see what hapens..

preposterous girl said...

@Adesh ,Rads,Suren
Hmm.. I'm really confused..but trying to do as u guys r suggesting
But he is now saying sorry..For the time being I'm ignoring him..

preposterous girl said...

@Sugar Cube..
Yipee.I won I won.. Lol
U can still use it girl..I dnt hav the copyright :P

preposterous girl said...

@Archana
Its very difficult to just move on..I'm trying.I hope this ordeal ends soon :(

AJai said...

if u like him and can trust him stick with him... else dump him.

Rachit Goel said...

This one is a pretty hard situation and it becums really tough to decide...but ask ursef only one thing if u dnt want to weep in future...
Can u live together happily ever, without making some serious break-ups?
Its hard to live away, its even harder to sustain afterwards...

Vinay said...

Don't tax yourself. After he said "Move on", I feel you should get on with other more important things. But frankly speaking, our comments on this issue would be more like those SMS votes in reality contests. High on emotion and sentiments and low on analysis.

Kaddu said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Kaddu said...

Wanna share this little poem that helped me a lot 3 years ago...

Let Go and Let God

As children bring their broken toys
with tears for us to mend
i broght my broken dreams to God
because he was my friend

But instead of leaving him
in peace to work alone
i hung around and tried to help
with ways that were my own.

At last i snatched them back & cried,
"How can u be so slow?" He said,
"My precious child, What could i do?
You never did let go..."


Leave things to God for a while... if u & that guy are meant to be together, u will get together eventually... & if not, then there's simply no point wasting time brooding over it! You cannot do anything either way! Take up some new hobby to distract urself!

P.S. - Had to delete the previous comment & re-post 'coz the formatting didn't come the way I wanted it to! :-p

preposterous girl said...

Hey kaddu..
Hmm. leaving it to God... Yeah trying that but as u said it "How can u be so slow?" I get so impatient..
I just grab my phone and go to his number dial it and then disconnect.Then again leave it on God..
i sincerely hope God speeds up this time :(

preposterous girl said...

@Rachit and Vinay
Believe you me..I'm really trying very hard to "move on" Indulging in fun, friends..But dnt knw how even a split second break brings me back to square one..
Anyways ..I'm sure life must be having something really special for me.. :)

Sweet Nothings!!! said...

hey dear...you know its better get hurt now then be sorry for your entire life..I had a friend of mine who shares the same plight as yours ,but she choose not to undermine her self respect and is way more happy now.
I know its reallllllllllyyyy Hard but believe meyou would love your decision later...

ashkd said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
preposterous girl said...

@ashkd
I dnt think he knows my online identity.. so u see I'm pretty anonymous here..
And about courage.. umm I dnt knw..When i wrote it , it was quite spontaneous.may be if i had given it a thought I wouldn't have written it..
Anyways thanks for dropping and commenting here.. :)

Parv Kaushik said...

man this is the dilemma everyone faces in the relationships.. to stay or to move on... u dnt knw.. hw can u knw.. mind says one thing heart says another.. the grass is alwez greener on the other side.. but i'd like to say listen to your heart... dnt listen to a zillion thoughts and reasons.. do as your heart tells u to!!

Blue Panther said...

Sometimes, giving a second chance makes sense. And at other times giving a second chance can be the biggest mistake of your life. The final decision has to be yours.

However, on the basis of the post, I say you should Move On!

Gautam said...

@Girl - I know what you mean, what you are going through ! I really feel for you.

If he left you for someone else and is back today, my suggestion is don't go back to him. Tomorrow he might find someone else and you'll be left in the same path - din yer mama tel you "once a thief is always a thief".

Let go of him now. If he really loves you and cares for you, he'll come back to you, someday !

preposterous girl said...

Hi Gautam..
Sorry fo being so late in replying..Dnt knw how I missed ur comment may be coz of exams.. But thats no excuse.. so sorry again..
U r here first time.I hope u liked my blog..
Yeah I'm still in the thought process whether to be or not to be with him..
Its really so sweet of u that u can understasnd my pain..Lets see how life turns up for me in the romantic front..
And thanx again for dropping by and do come back ya :)

The Lone Wolf said...

hey!
first off,thanks for the review i'd asked for on indiblogger.secondly,your blog's layout and articles are fantastic!i'm totally gonna follow your blog :)

and yeah...i'm sure things would work out for you. :)

अनिल कान्त : said...

अगर इन्सान एक दूसरे से प्यार करते हैं तो लडाई झगडे तो होते रहते हैं
Nobody is perfect !!

मेरी कलम - मेरी अभिव्यक्ति

preposterous girl said...

Huh.. something wrong with my eyes.. dnt knw how am I missing comments on my blog..Sorry everyone for late reply..

@Parv
Yeah its the toughest situation..when friends used to fall in this situation I so easily adviced them "he doesn't desrve u, Move on.. etcetra etcetra..
But its so difficult to follow those..
lets see..for the time being I'm maintaining a distance..Dnt knw though for how long!

preposterous girl said...

Hey Ajai ..
sorry for soooo late reply.. Dumping him is really tough decision..I just cant imagine myself without him :(

preposterous girl said...

@ Sweet Nothings..
Sorry 4 such late reply.was busy in exams.
maybe u r right but I'm still in a dilemma .. Dnt knw wht to do :(

preposterous girl said...

@Blue Panther
First of all very sorry for late reply.
:( Dnt knw yaar how much time I'm gng to take in deciding to move on..

preposterous girl said...

Hi Lone Wolf..
Welcome to my blog.. Thanx 4 the follow and the good wishes..Its really nice to knw that u liked my blog's layout and posts..
Keep coming back haan.. :D
BTW nice name u have :)

preposterous girl said...

@अनिल कान्त
मेरे ब्लॉग पर आपका स्वागत है..आपकी टिप्पणियों के लिए धन्यवाद..कृप्या दोबारा पधारें ..
पर झगड़े से ज्यादा लड़ाई हो तो प्यार कहीं खो जाता है . कुछ ऐसा ही मेरा साथ हुआ है ..
आपका ब्लॉग जरुर पढूंगी..

Rachit Goel said...

www.rachitforu.blogspot.com

Anonymous said...

i just needed this! i came across this post just at the right time!

wow. its good to read such advices. i've got loads of them, but sadly im finding it very difficult to implement. it took me 1 year to come over a 4 month relationship. ok, i dont mean to be ranting about my life ..so yeah coming to the topic ..

i know, there's a time when u just HATE urself for giving in and meeting him whenever he wants to and when u want to meet up, he's unavailable!
but u know what, with time u realise the importance of that person in your life. there's always a reason for someone to enter ur life ..i believe. so, after the learning's done ..just move on. keep ur mind off him. replace his memories with something else. if its meant to be, it'll happen ..otherwise there's no point wasting time and energy on someone so insignificant who just pops up and screws ur life!

do crazy things ..like finding new crushes or something ..i tried. i failed miserably. haha, next thing i know he had so many after me ..and i just sat there like an idiot crying over him.

anyway, all the best!
u deserve someone better, someone who respects u and loves u.

ciao!

muthu said...

Have U seen the film "The holiday"

U pretty much sound like Kate Winslet in the movie.

Yeah, U need more self restraint. A relationship has to nurtured by both the people 4 it to grow.

Do see the movie. I implore U. It will - I think give an not only a solution but also the inspiration to do it.

cheers..

:)

preposterous girl said...

Hey Mutthu..
Nope havent seen the movie..Lemme see that , then we'll discuss it..

workhard said...

Hey.. i was exactly like this once upon a time.. and then.. one day i decided to let go.. believe me i am much happier.. one doesnot need to be wid someone who treats u like crap..


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