I took up a challenge around 3 months back..And believe you me , It was a real toughy as it had to be performed in the notorious and infamous Rape Capital of India..
I didnt dared to tell this to my mum about this challenge lest she would have surely discouraged.. umm no not discouraged she would have locked me up for even just having a thought to be so adventurous..:)
Okay now enough of introduction..Lets get down to business.So I took up this challange of STEP BY STEP GUIDE TO UNAPOLOGETIC WALKING initiated by blanknoise.
I'm writting first the challenge and then its result..
1. Walk very very slowly.
To start with this step, I was a little sceptical. What if someone considers me a "lose character"?? But then after a day of constant muddling with this question I came to the conclusion- WHO CARES !! This is my city.I have full right to take a stroll, to admire its beauty by walking very very slowly..
Result : I constantly got second looks, sometimes even 3rd or 4th look.. Once the guy in the car slowed his car and gave some "signals" that I can get a lift..
2. Walk without your phone.
This was not very difficult coz anyways my phone was in service centre, so it was like out of compulsion too.But there was always this fear in the initial days that what if someone grabs me , put into the moving car then I dont have any mode of communication..
But thankfully nothing of that sort happened.I think this step was added so that we girls can walk confidently without being in touch with some friend or spouse constantly..
I declare that this step was quite easy for me to perform.. :)
3. Walk without your bag.
Phew..I didnt knew that I was unconsciously using bags to hide myself from those oggling eyes.. :o
When I walked without my big bag, I almost felt naked.. Yes naked is the word.. I used to hide myself..Maybe I was not comfortable with my body..But after 10 days without the bag, I felt confident..
I cant say this for all the girls out there, but I definitely felt better. May be I was underconfident earlier :(
4. Walk without your arms crossed or folded.
Now this was a habit and very difficult to get rid off.Standing on the bus stop when all the rickshawwalas, local uncle-jis , pani-wala , bus-conductors staring at ur breasts, what u'll do.. Crossing arms is like reflex action deep embedded in ur brains..
I'm telling u very difficult to undo this action..But finally I won over that too..but with cheating..I started wearing dupatta :P but for just two day till I got down to point 17..
After some days I succeeded without any cheats.. When someone stared ,I stared them back with the look- "Don't mess with me"
5. Walk without your sunglasses
Can't say anything about this coz I dont have sunglasses :( .This point in a way helped my wishlist to grow.Have to save money now :P
BTW I dont know y this point coz I always thought that sunglasses make u more "vulnerable" to those "vultures"
6. Walk without looking on the ground.
After I took up this challenge then I noticed many of the women use this "strategy " of looking on the ground..It was fun looking the world straight in their eyes.Many of those stares changed their directions , just by looking in the eyes :)
7. Walk looking at passersby.
This one was real fun when I had to look at the hotties ;)
On a serious note, even my friends thought what am I doing..Can,t say about its results coz I'm still not comfortable doing this + I can,t understand its rationale..
8. Walk with your shoulders back
Panic button pressed here..!! Shoulders back means.. No slumped posture means torso fully in-a-way exposed with clothes on!!But I dared and came over this too.Now I can confidently walk down any road without any adjustments in my posture :)
9. Walk with your chin a little raised.
This was almost same as No.6 .. So same results.No extra work here.
10. Walk with a smile.
:-D Tough when I'm not blessed with a smiling face :P and also a smile without any reason in our society means "I'm asking for it".. This one took me the longest to adjust..A guy even smiled back once :-D
11. Walk swinging your arms.
Swinging my arms??? How can I?? I'm always taught to walk straight without looking here and there..
Oh let me tell u one thing..While this experiment, I was thinking as to why girls don't look here and there while walking, atleast in Delhi.. I tried looking here n there..And voila!! I got the result.. coz every nook and corner, on the sides of the roads, even on the sides of the bus stops , u can see men relieving themselves relieving themselves..Girls surely don't want to have a dekko of those flashing u-know-what of men suffering from uncontollable-bladder.
12. Walk humming a song.
I love it..I love humming songs but in public places.It was a definite no-no.. I remeber once a girl was humming song in the bus and an elder cousin said "look that girl is singing".. Maybe the seed germinated there that girls should not hum in full public view or else u r again "asking for it"..
But I tried it first with i-pod on and humming along with it..Some eyes were raised.Women gave me a strange look..
Then I graduated to the next step. Humming without any support.. Few days later, I can confidently hum louder without any thoughts about "log kya kahenge"
13. Walk whistling.
Poor me :( I cant whistle.. so no results.. But this one will surely brand us Adam-teasers ;) what say girl-whistlers :P
14. Walk day dreaming.
Oh I do it all the time.And I started doing it with no.1 point, where I had to walk very slowly..
15. Walk in the middle of a pavement.
This one was tough more because here in Delhi the two-wheeler drivers prefer to drive their bikes on the footpath leaving no space for pedestrians..And the walled sides have stench of urine, so even tougher to walk there.. :)
So no pavement walking- middle or sides :(
16. Walk alone.
Difficult during sunny afternoons.I used the preventive measures which always pops-up in newspapers like walking against the traffic and using more crowded roads..I couldnot incorporate slow walking and walking alone away from my home like near college.. I felt defeated here :(
17. Walk without your duppata.
Told u earlier ..I took some time to adjust.But with other points like walking looking straight helped a lot :)
18. Walk wearing the one garment you always wanted to but did not because you someone made you feel you ar 'asking for it'
This one garment was a low-neckline top.I wore it only if some friend is picking and dropping by car..not even bike..
So I decide to wear it.. And I wore it and ended up getting lots of unwanted comments while walking down the road.But like other times, I didnt felt guilty.. :D
19. Walk alone.
I dont know y this point was repeated.May be this was done on purpose..
20. Walk at 7 am. 5 am. midnight. 3 pm. 1 pm. 9 pm.
I tried jogging at 5 and 7 a.m. it was tough and I failed..I could not jog as people were staring as in my locality girls dont jog .None at all...I'm at loss of reason for this :(
Though I admit I didnt tried that hard as I did in other points, coz I'm too lazy to go out for jogging :P
Minight I didnot tried.My mum will kill me.I'll give it a try if I can sneak out or if I'm alone .. :P
After this 3 months experiment I came out more confident and comfortable.. I was able to undo many of the things which were never reall taught but somehow got embedded in me and in other girls..But I cant generalise.Please let me know if u girls or boys who know their spouse,friends,relatives behave like I behaved earlier.
I'm really thankful to Blanknoise for taking up this initiative..Kudos to u.. :)
I request you all out there to please make this sexually repressive society come out of this dogma of sexuality.